Surrogacy Options for Gay Couples

When it comes to family building for gay couples, the fact that they cannot build families naturally means that they rely on alternative ways to fulfill this desire. One of the more common options is to use a gestational carrier. Typically, a gestational carrier can be one who is known to the couple, or one that is sourced from an agency. This article will focus on the gestational carrier, how they are selected, the scope of their services, the benefits as well as legal structures that exist to ensure the success of this delicate process.   

What Is Surrogacy?

Surrogacy is the more common term used to identify a gestational carrier. A surrogate is a person who substitutes, or stands in to carry a pregnancy to term. Due to the nature of the gay relationship, a third party is engaged to provide the much needed womb that would carry the embryo to term, as well as give birth when the time comes. Surrogacy is not only used by gay couples, it has been used for many decades by individuals and heteronormative couples who for some reason or other, are unable to carry a pregnancy to term. 

What is a Gestational Carrier?

A gestational carrier is the person who steps in, providing their uterus for the gestational period so that the baby can develop until the time comes for them to be born. Gestational carriers can become pregnant either through sexual intercourse, in vitro fertilization (IVF) or  intrauterine insemination (IUI) treatments. The child formed can therefore be related to the surrogate only, the surrogate and one of the parents, or only one of the parents, biologically. Surrogates typically use their own eggs although there are times when the eggs are obtained from a third party donor. As well, a couple may prefer to use an embryo from a third party agency, in which case, neither parent nor surrogate would be related biologically to the child. When it comes to sperm, the typical practice is for gay couples to use their own sperm, although there are circumstances where donor sperm may be used, perhaps due to hereditary diseases or conditions. 

How to Choose a Surrogate

Just like the sperm and eggs, surrogates can be known to the couple, or selected from a surrogacy agency. Once a surrogate is selected, there are a few evaluations that a surrogacy must go through in order to determine if they are a suitable match. A suitable match is one who is medically fit, and psychologically prepared to undertake the role of surrogacy and see it through. 

In order to regulate this, some recommendations laid out by the The American Society for Reproductive Medicine provide the guidelines for selecting an ideal candidate to be a surrogate. Surrogacy agencies are the preferred option because they carry out the vetting process, which is also a cost-savings for the couple:

• Surrogates must be between 21 and 42 years old
• A surrogate’s Body Mass Index (BMI) should be under 30
• Surrogates should smoke or use nicotine-based products, 
• Surrogates must not have a history of substance abuse
• A surrogate should be financially independent
• Surrogates should not have a history of mental illness
• A surrogate should not have any genetic conditions that can be passed down
• Surrogates have to have carried at least one pregnancy to term.
• A surrogate must also not have had more than five pregnancies
• Surrogates must have carried their pregnancies to term with no more than one delivery by cesarean section
• Surrogates must live in a state that has surrogacy friendly laws.

Legal Considerations for Gay Surrogacy

Legal Counsel

Surrogates do not have any parental rights or responsibilities over the child once it is born. Their services come to an end, once the child is delivered. In order to avoid complications that could arise during the course of pregnancy and possibly after, it is advisable for both surrogate and couple to get legal counsel ahead of time. This will help both parties to establish the scope of their roles, and determine responsibility over the costs of the pregnancy. 

State Law

Whereas most states support surrogacy, Louisiana and Nebraska law does not allow for surrogates to be compensated for their services. Since compensation for surrogacy is the practice, it is critical for the couple to pursue surrogacy in States whose laws will support their family building goals.

Legal Agreements

The process of legal counsel should result in legal agreements between the couple and their gestational carrier. These agreements should be in place before the surrogacy process begins. A Gestational Surrogacy Agreement and a Pre-birth Order are two of the main agreements used to define the scope of responsibilities and establish the parentage of both members of the gay couple. Without the second document, one of the parents of the child may have to have to adopt the child in order for them to have full parental rights.

How Much Does Surrogacy Cost?

The cost of surrogacy starts from $30,000 and can range upward of $100,000. This amount covers every expense that will be incurred in the process from beginning to end. It is recommended that one contact their health insurance provider in order to be made aware of which costs of the process would be covered, and which would not. 

Contact Us

There are very many ways to build families regardless of the nature of a couple’s relationship. If you would like to explore other family building options, contact Virginia Fertility & IVF. We shall endeavor to assist you in finding the most suitable family building option for you and your partner. We have experts ready at our various locations across the country.